Thursday, January 31, 2008

Home Improvement

One of the biggest misconceptions I had about babies when I first became a mom was that once they started sleeping through the night they would continue to sleep through the night. So when little 10 week old Emily first slept for an 8 hour stretch I was ecstatic! I had heard horror stories of 3 year olds who had never yet slept through an entire night at one stretch, and my mom told me my sister didn't sleep through the night until they let her cry it out when she was 6 months old. 6 months! However did they manage? I couldn't believe they let that nonsense go on for that long.

Fast forward to weeks 18-26 or so, and Emily was back to her old tricks, getting up 2 or even 3 times a night. Since then she has gone through phases, she'll sleep through the night like a champ for a week or two, then it's back to getting up for at least one snack and visit at night.

I know I shouldn't complain. I have a friend whose 8.5 month old still wakes up 5-7 times a night and often screams for an hour or two while she's up. I don't know how this amazing woman is still alive, let alone coherent during the day.

The last two days Emily has awakened in the night, and at 5:00AM decided that sleep is for chumps and insistently declared that she is ready to start her day. Usually she eats at 5 but then goes back to sleep until 8, allowing me time to get breakfast and Will's lunch together and get the morning dishes under control. It makes a big difference, not having those couple hours baby-free. Going on less sleep than you're used to and being responsible for a baby for more waking hours than is customary is stressful, and stress breeds more stress.

Will is having his single most stressful time at work ever, with closing down the Job Shop, selling off the equipment, placing employees in new positions and moving into a new position himself in the new building. I have been very stressed recently, because every single day this week we've had construction workers tromping through our house, putting in overhead lights, installing microwaves, waking up Emily when I FINALLY get her down for a nap etc. I've made more trips than I care to think about to Home Depot, where they put products on display that are actually special order items but there's no way for a customer to tell that unless they track down an employee 5 aisles over who has no idea what's going on in the appliances department (but who you suspect would still be giving you that bovine stare even if you were in his area of "expertise") and 40 minutes later after contacting 3 other employees and paging a manager you find out you're out of luck.

Even as I write this, it was discovered that the microwave I ended up buying because it was the only one available right away had been returned by the previous purchaser not because it was "Too big", but because the idiots who tried to install it the first time stripped a screw on the back and pushed two lug nuts INTO the back of the microwave so it is completely useless. HOORAY, ANOTHER TRIP TO HOME DEPOT TODAY AND ANOTHER DAY WITH WORKMEN IN MY KITCHEN AT 8AM!

Even the dogs are stressed. Remy barfs if you look at him sideways, which means I have to wash the floor constantly lest Emily goes crawling through a pile of dog vomit. Heck, taking in the view that will be on display for our party guests on Sunday of the bare light bulbs hanging by wires from my ceiling and the gaping hole in my kitchen where a microwave used to be makes me want to barf. I am on day 2 of starting up Weight Watchers to lose this baby weight, which takes some time and planning, which stresses me out, which means I want to eat. Or barf. When your stomach's constantly in a knot it's hard to distinguish the two feelings.

Do you ever feel like your like will never be under control again? And if you chuckle to yourself and say "That's parenthood honey" then so help me I will drive over to your house with my dog and we'll both barf on your floor.


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